Jennifer's Live Journal

A fairly intuitive friend told me April 4th would be the Day, and today is the 4th.  I must admit, I held out a lot of high hopes that today would be the day, but since its already almost 3pm, the odds of that happening are getting lower every minute.

The other question weighing heavily on my mind right now is this: Should I use pregnancy as an excuse to go home early today?  I'd really rather be home right now, and it would be quite easy to make some vague reference to my (male) boss about not feeling well, and would be let go with no questions asked...hmmm...is that exactly ethical?

There are days that I long for the simplicity of the 1950s.  Womankind has fought for decades for equality and power, and now we have what I call the "Superwoman" complex.  As said modern day Superwoman, I am the President and CEO of a very complex organization called my life.  Unfortunately, said Superwoman CEO is getting more tired everyday, and the stock options in my life company are quickly losing value.

Enough with the shitty metaphors, I suppose. This is by no means a drunk post; it is a post written in shear exhaustion.  I spend my days running at top speed, working a complex and high demanding job that requires my brain to be operating at 100% all the time.  Then, in every spare moment I'm not working, I'm working a high demanding job at home - cleaning the house, running the errands, paying all the bills, making all the decisions, everything.  I think back to the 1950s, when I wouldn't be working at all. My sole job would be house and child care. I wouldn't be responsible for making all the "life" decisions (What car should we buy? Should we refinance the mortgage? Are all the bills paid on time? Who should we call to fix the broken dryer?)  In the 1950s, my husband would kindly pat me on the head and say, "Don't you worry your little head about things like that, sweetie." And I wouldn't.

Now, anyone who knows me realizes that kind of existence would surely drive me mad, so my longing for the simplicity of the idealistic 1950s is simply a desire for rest and peace right now at this moment in time.  I get inspired when I find myself surrounded by strong powerful Superwomen who are all the CEOs of their family's lives, yet I get frustrated when I see these Superwomen tied to men who's most complex decision they will make all day is what kind of sword to purchase for their WoW character. Decades of fighting for equality, and THIS is what we get?

My cell phone is completely fried, so bad that Alltel can't even recover the phone numbers out of it.  Since I have the phone numbers of every person I've ever met in the past 5 years, this is a devastating loss for me.

Please help me repopulate my cell phone address book.  If you can read this, I most likely HAD your phone number and would desperately like it back. Please message me with it so I can rebuild.  I will lock the message to protect your privacy.

This message will be reposted everywhere I can.

Check out this article from Tampa Tribune - looks like little Zoey is being born under a particularly weathly sign of the Chinese Zodiac. Mama's little cash cow is gonna support us in our old age!

Chinese Hospitals Brace For Baby Boom
By EDWARD CODY 
The Washington Post

Published: Mar 4, 2007

BEIJING - The Year of the Pig has turned into the year of the baby. Chinese hospitals have been submerged in recent months under a tide of pregnant women; newborns are arriving in droves; and companies that manufacture diapers are upping their advertising budgets. The reason is simple: The Year of the Pig, which began Feb. 18, is a good year to be born.

Since time immemorial, prospective parents have been told, children born under the pig's patronage will benefit from the animal's image as fat, happy, wealthy and prosperous. Now, couples who schemed to have their babies in these blessed times are hoping for good fortune.

"My family already has two pigs, including my father, and I want to add one more pig," said a pregnant 28-year-old secretary who identified herself only as Ms. Lian. "I guess three pigs will also bring luck to us," she explained. "Also, I believe people who are born in the Year of the Pig are honest because my father is such a person."

Less than 2 months to go, and I'm feeling every minute of it now.  This pregnancy has been pretty easy up until now, but things are starting to get hard.  I'm very tired all the time.  Last night, I desperately tried to stay up to watch Heroes, made it far enough to hear the words, "Previously, on Heroes..." and passed out.  (Thank god for the DVR; I can watch it later.)

If I sit too long, the blood pools in my legs and it hurts when I stand up. I have a sharp pain in the middle of my back most of the time.  I have trouble getting comfortable sleeping, and I have trouble getting comfortable sitting.  The baby likes to sit very heavy and low, and it keeps pulling my belly down low and forward, it hurts. I have heartburn a lot and pop Tums like they're candy.  Speaking of candy, I can't eat any cause I'm trying to be careful about this last little bit of weight gain.

On the good side, I'm really starting to get things together for the baby. I have most of the stuff I need, just missing a few things.  Chris surprised me this weekend and finished putting together all the baby's furniture and painting her room.  When I went in and saw everything in the room pretty and in order, I almost cried.  It looks so cute.  The minutes are ticking down and I'm getting really excited about meeting Zoey, and I'm definately ready to be done being pregnant.

1 A tremor in the pants. The last time I felt this was 
  in the presence of my old master.
2 You are unwise to lower your pants.
3 We've got to be able to get some reading on those 
   pants, up or down.
4 She must have hidden the plans in her pants. Send 
   a detachment down to retrieve them.  See to it 
   personally Commander.
5 These pants may not look like much, kid, but they've 
   got it where it counts.
6 I find you lack of pants disturbing.
7 These pants contain the ultimate power in the Universe. 
   I suggest we use it.
8 Han will have those pants down. We've got to give 
   him more time!
9 General Veers, prepare your pants for a surface assault.
10 I used to bulls-eye womp-rats in my pants back home.
11 TK-421. . . Why aren't you in your pants?
12 Lock the door. And hope they don't have pants.
13 Governor Tarkin. I recognized your foul pants 
     when I was brought onboard.
14 You look strong enough to pull the pants off of a Gundark.
15 Luke. . . Help me take...these pants off.
16 Great, Chewie, great. Always thinking with your pants.
17 That blast came from those pants. That thing's operational!
18  Don't worry. Chewie and I have gotten into a lot of pants 
      more heavily guarded than this.
19 Maybe you'd like it back in your pants, your highness.
20 Your pants betray you. Your feelings for them are strong. 
     Especially for  your sister!
21 Jabba doesn't have time for smugglers who drop their pants at the 
     first sign of an Imperial Cruiser.
22 Yeah, well short pants is better than no pants at all, Chewie.
23 Attention. This is Lando Calrissean. The Empire has taken 
    control of my pants,  I advise everyone to leave before 
    more troops arrive.
24 I cannot teach him. The boy has no pants.
25 You came in those pants? You're braver than I thought.

So I just looked at my calendar and realized something amazing - as of tomorrow, I will officially be in my third and final trimester of pregnancy.  As of Friday, my baby will be here in exactly three months.  I am at once excited and terrified.  Not so long ago, April 12th seemed like SOOO far away, and now it seems so incredibly close and I just don't feel ready.  I haven't even started on her room and I have next to no baby supplies and stuff. Mentally, I don't think there's anyway anyone can know in advance of their first child whether they're ready or not. Sometimes I think I am, and then sometimes, I just know I'm going to fuck it up royally.

But on the other hand, I simply cannot WAIT to meet Zoey.  I had my first dream about her last night, actually holding her and seeing her. I can't even describe the happy, excited, contented feeling I had upon waking from that dream.  Its funny, I never really liked kids all that much. I was never very baby crazy.  I mean, there were individual kids that I know that I'm crazy about, but as a whole, I pretty much avoided them.  Now, my world has shifted completely, and I see babies everywhere. And that makes me happy.

Looking back, I am extremely thankful that my pregnancy has been healthy and relatively boring.  I haven't had any problems, and even my normal symptoms have not been all that difficult to deal with.  After problems I faced last year, and problems I know my friends have gone and are going through, I thank God everyday for this normal, healthy pregancy. Of course, the biggest and most painful symptom of all lies ahead of me, and in a relatively short period of time.  In no way do I expect labor to be as copacetic; in fact, I am a bit terrified. I don't deal with pain very well, and yet I am about to face what has been described as "the most painful experience in humanity". Yet the end result will be worth it, so that's what I will keep my eyes on.

For the first year ever, I did not make a single New Year's Resolution.  I don't have the energy in me to focus on minor self improvement goals when I am facing the most challenging and most exciting change in my life.  Every spare bit of my energy is going towards this pregnancy, the labor and finally, beginning to raise this new human being that God has entrusted to me. That's enough New Year's Resolution for anybody.

I, too, need a home address - yours!  Can you post here? Comments are screened, yada yada yada.

So, as if my sugar levels weren't high enough after the Christmas holidays, I was scheduled for a glucose test today.  This is the test they use to determine whether I have gestational diabetes.  I was given a little 10-ounce bottle of what looked like soda. I was to drink this bottle down in 5 minutes. Precisely one hour later, they drew my blood to run their tests.

This bottle contained, I swear, liquid sugar.  The ingredients listed 5 grams of glucose (sugar) per ounce of liquid.  It was the nastiest stuff I have drunk in a long time.  It tasted like a very very super sweet, but flat Sprite.  Ugh.  I really wanted to throw it up immediately after drinking it, but only the knowledge that if I threw it up, I'd just have to drink it down again another time kept me from retching.

I did keep it down and went to my appointment and now I feel wretched.  I still feel nauseaous and I have a splitting headache.  I never even had that cool sugar high you get from eating too much candy - I went straight through to the sugar crash.  Uck uck uck.  If the doctor were to call me today and tell me, "Yup, you've got diabetes, no more sugar for you for the next 4 months", I would gladly give up all sugar products with no problem and no complaints right now!

So, I've got a bit of a financial dilemma, and I could use some advice.  Chris and I have two cars - a Jeep SUV and a Ford Mustang.  Chris thinks we should sell the Ford Mustang because it is not a "family car".  I must admit that it would be difficult getting a baby seat in and out of that car.

However, I hesistate to get rid of it and buy another car for a couple of reasons. The main reason is that the car will be paid off in a year, and then I will have extra money in my pocket.  No matter what, if I sold the Mustang and bought another car, I would have another 5 years of payments, which I REALLY don't want to do.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with the Mustang; its in perfect running order.  It has less than 60k miles on it - really good for a 6 year old car.  Besides, with Chris working nights, and having his own work vehicle, its really only me driving a vehicle. The other vehicle stays in the garage and rarely gets driven. I don't want to pay another 5 years of payments for a car that sits in the garage!  Since the Jeep IS a better family vehicle, I vote that whoever has the baby, gets the Jeep.  The other person drives the Mustang.

What are your thoughts? Get rid of the Mustang for something more "family friendly"?  (Or at least something with 4 doors so I don't have to bring the baby out through the trunk?)  Or, keep the almost-paid-for Mustang until it falls apart?

The upcoming Nintendo Wii will use a revolutionary new controller which won't be used for any of the following: